Your Warhorses Need a Driver
Over the past two newsletters, we’ve explored the two powerful warhorses inside you:
The Super Ego—that moral judge, full of guilt and pressure when unregulated.
The Id—that raw hunger for pleasure, quick to react and blind to consequence.
Now there’s nothing wrong with having a sense of morality and with wanting a good time. But when these beasts are allowed to run unchecked without a skilled driver, they’ll trample over everything in your life.
That’s why you need your Ego.
And not the egotistical, self-absorbed, hubris-driven version people warn you about.
I’m talking about the healthy Ego. The strong, steady container for self that knows how to hold the reins and guide both of those horses toward something meaningful.
So today’s newsletter won’t be a long one, as it doesn’t take a lot to understand how much we’ve been vilifying the Ego, and how important it is to have a healthy one.
Never Check Your Ego at the Door
I’ve mentioned this before but it’s worth saying again; people love to say, “Check your ego at the door.”
Don’t.
That’s stupid advice.
Your Ego is NOT the enemy. It’s amoral. How YOU choose to use your Ego can make the difference between a wonderful Ego or a destructive one.
So, check your arrogance at the door. Check your pride. Check your inflated self-importance. Your entitlement. But never check your Ego.
Without it, the Super Ego will crush you with shame, and the Id will drag you into every craving, rage, or fear that crosses your mind. You’ll listen to both and allow then to run in any direction they please without regulation.
Your Ego is what chooses the appropriate direction and it’s the one that should be driving. It’s the part of you that pauses to consider, weighs your options, and steers you down a path that doesn’t allow you to hurt yourself or others.
The Container for Self
Another way to think of your Ego is as the container for everything you are—the steady part of you that knows your values, your purpose, and your identity.
Without it, everything you are would be hard to grasp, spill out, and could even get lost.
When your Ego is healthy and containing your sense of self:
The Super Ego still calls you to higher standards, but it does it with wisdom instead of shame.
The Id still seeks pleasure, but it seeks it in ways that build you instead of breaking you.
So now what?
So now that you know how vital your Ego is, how do you build a strong one?
Start small.
Take one situation this week—just one—and pause before you act or respond. Ask yourself:
What’s driving me right now—guilt, impulse, or choice?
Will the choice I make reflect my values and allow me to grow into the kind of person I want to be?
Does my decision intentionally hurt me or others?
The truth is, in order to strengthen your Ego, you need to train it.
A strong Ego isn’t built overnight. It’s built every time you choose to lead yourself instead of letting those warhorses run wild.
That’s how you live at full choice.
* * *
RESCUE YOUR DREAMS®
A Guidebook to Save the Life You Forgot You Wanted
BUY YOUR COPY HERE
* * * *
Check out my new audio series, Rescue Your Dreams® - A Podcast to Save the Life You Forgot You Wanted and learn how some of the best practitioners of mindfulness, intentionality, and development discover their true selves.
While you’re there, be sure to subscribe so you don’t miss the next one.
If you’re interested in taking your life to the next level, you can schedule a free consultation call with me to see if personal coaching would help you Rescue Your Dreams® so you can transform your reality.
Click HERE for my Calendly link!
Ever upward!