A Summit to Climb
A couple weeks ago, I had the privilege of being one of the development facilitators at the Lead From Identity Summit in Silverton, Colorado. It’s a two-day, invite-only experience that helps leaders step away from titles, roles, and responsibilities to reconnect with who they are beneath it all — their true identity.
On day one of the summit, we ask participants not to share what they do, who they work for, or what their title is.
A difficult task when we’re so conditioned to asking strangers at social gatherings, “So, what do you do?”
That small adjustment, for just one day, changes the entire atmosphere. Without labels, conversations shift from networking to relating. From “What do you do?” to “Who are you?”, “Tell me about yourself.”, or even “What are you into?”
It’s one of my favorite parts of the experience as it’s incredible to watch people see each other for their humanity first, rather than their hierarchy.
When the Weight Becomes Too Much
On the second day, something powerful happened. Several attendees decided to share poems they’d written over the course of the summit — a result of an organic moment and challenge from the night before.
It’s hard to put yourself out there, and I was so proud of the courage it took for people to share honest, vulnerable reflections on what they were discovering about themselves.
One of those reflections was one of the most eloquent expressions of pain, frustration, and exhaustion I’ve ever heard.
In it, one of the summit attendees described the overwhelming sense of walking in circles. Each step heavy, familiar, and fruitless. She described seeing and feeling heavy chains set upon her shoulders — weighed down by expectations, self-doubt, and the pressures she was facing.
So heavy were the chains that she couldn’t even raise her head to look up. All she could do was trudge on with her head down, and a hopeless sense of not being able to move forward, only in circles.
Until eventually that weight of the chains became too much. She collapsed under it, falling backward, unable to continue.
And when she finally looked up, flat on her back, she saw the face of her dear friend, and my mentor, Dr. Doug McKinley — a man who has poured himself into so many lives in the hopes that others would be able to live and lead from a deep sense of who they really are.
It was a moment of grace and recognition that brought the entire room to silence. Doug’s eyes filled with tears of gratitude and humility.
Everyone felt the truth of what she had shared — that sense of getting nowhere. Doomed to walk in circles, giving everything you have, only to find yourself seemingly back where you started.
It’s Not a Circle
Her words stuck with me that night and long after the summit ended. Because I know that feeling.
And I bet you know that feeling, too.
The frustration of believing you’re going nowhere. The fatigue of effort without reward. The hopeless feeling that you’ve gotten no further, nothing will change, and maybe you should just stop trying.
But as I reflected on her story, a different picture began to form.
We’re so used to defining our lives as linear. Always trying to go from point A to point B. And when that doesn’t happen, we fool ourselves into believing we’re walking in circles, weighed down by the pressures of life, our anxieties, and how much we doubt our own abilities.
But what if we’ve misunderstood that feeling of walking in circles? What if the movement that feels repetitive isn’t leading us back to where we started after all?
What if life isn’t linear?
And what if that circle is a spiral staircase?
From above, a spiral looks like you’re going around in circles. From within, it feels like repetition. But from the side — from the perspective you rarely get to see — it’s upward motion. Progress disguised as déjà vu.
That’s why it feels so tiring. You’re not standing still. You’re climbing.
And when the weight gets too heavy, sometimes it’s only when you collapse that you finally see how far you’ve risen — and that you were never walking in circles at all.
If that’s true, then maybe now is a good time to pause and ask yourself:
Where in your life do you feel like you’re walking in circles?
What’s been weighing you down or keeping you from noticing your own progress?
How can you rewrite the narrative in your mind of getting nowhere into the truth of how far you’ve actually climbed? What evidence tells you that you’re rising?
So now what?
Maybe this isn’t a loop you’re trapped in. Maybe it’s a climb you haven’t recognized yet.
When life feels repetitive, when every step feels familiar and heavy, remind yourself: a spiral staircase feels like a circle until you look up.
Keep climbing — even if progress is slow. Rest when you need to. Fall if you must. But always keep climbing…
Ever upward.
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